I was going to begin this with

DALLAS SUCKS!

But they won yesterday, so I guess I need to amend it to

DALLAS ISN’T VERY GOOD!

Either way, it has nothing to do with this post, but it’s fun to say

DALLAS SUCKS!

No, this post is about the ongoing unfairness of the universe and a few of the galactically stupid and opaquely insensitive people who run it.
Of course, I’m talking about the PIAA (Pennsylvania Interscholastic Athletic Association), which not only made me ineligible to play football my junior year because of a technicality in transferring schools that pretty much ruined my life (not to put too fine a point on it), but they continue to make public schools play all-star teams for a state championship.

We live in the Parkland School District here in the Allentown, Pennsylvania area, and we generally have a good football team that every year seems to earn a spot in the state championship tournament. And every year, at some point while moving up the bracket, we run into St. Joseph’s Prep from Philadelphia. St. Joe’s is a nationally famous catholic high school because of its team; its known as a football factory. They’re known as a football factory because they are very good and every year produce many players who go on to play NCAA Division 1 football—they’re big time! They’re so big time that many of the Philadelphia Eagles football players put their sons in the program, although none of them live anywhere near the school.

That’s because here in the Keystone State (where equality is just a political campaign slogan), private schools may accept students from anywhere, whereas public schools may only enroll students who live in the district.

Starting to get the picture? St. Joe’s has players on its roster from all over New Jersey, Pennsylvania, and Delaware. Since they have such a large region to choose from, they get only the best: players who are big and/or fast and have pedigree. And worse, the media celebrates them as a great high school football program.

What balderdash!

And I’m not even going to get into the utter hypocrisy of the church, but the whole kit and kaboodle ought to be ashamed of themselves.
On this past Friday evening, Parkland once again faced St. Joes in the quarter finals, and once again, the bullies from Philly trounced them 46-7. Next week St. Joes will play another public school, Downingtown West, who they will beat, and then go on to the championship game against another catholic school, Central Catholic from Pittsburgh. St. Joes will be heavily favored to win its ninth state championship in the last 12 years. Two of the years that they didn’t win it, they were in the championship game and lost by a combined score of 10 points. Central Catholic won it the other year.

Can anybody possibly believe this is good for the players? What kind of life lessons is the PIAA teaching these young minds…on both teams? This is a travesty.

Speaking of life lessons, the attached picture, like the opening of this rant, has nothing to do with my outrage, other than it’s of a somewhat starry-eyed 13-year-old playing his first year of football, about to learn something valuable on the workings of the universe and a few of the galactically stupid and opaquely insensitive people who run it.

You might notice I’m not wearing a facemask. Facemasks were a relatively new thing back then, and I got that helmet after the season began. It was just before a game, and they didn’t have time to put one on. I told them not to, and, for some unfathomable reason, they didn’t. I was very happy because if they had, I wouldn’t be able to bite guys when I ended up at the bottom of a pile.

I’m always thinking, even way back then.

That was in the fall of 1960, and it was a great time to be alive for a kid just coming into his own. Kennedy was elected president, Bonanza was being beamed into our homes in living color, everybody was doing the twist, sex became a lot more attainable with the introduction of The Pill, and the Philadelphia Eagles won the NFL Championship by beating the celebrated Vince Lombardi Green Bay Packers. Also during that season, the Eagles beat the first-year-in-the-NFL Cowboys because

DALLAS SUCKS!

Some life lessons you never forget.